Category: meaning of flowers

Love in Sadness: A definition of true love

~ Bébébisous33 ~ Leave a comment
SJW’s mother is gardening while talking to Yoon Ma Ri.

In the episode 14, we discover why the writer chose to name this drama “Love in Sadness”. In this episode, YMR visits SJW’s mother, Im Yun Hwa (IYH), as she is the director of a nursing facility. Here, IYH shows YMR her garden with her flowers. YMR is now able to understand why SJW loves flowers so much. He got his passion from his mother. In this scene, the mother chooses to plant a gentian and this is what she says to her guest:

Notice that the gentian here is purple and not dark blue
Most of the species have beautiful blue vivid petals.

These words and her action reveal a lot about SJW’s mother. She doesn’t perceive YMR as a burden because she has WHK’s face. In fact, she views the young woman as a good omen. In my opinion, when she explains the origin of the gentian in her garden, she was making an analogy. YMR is like the gentian that suddenly appeared in her garden. No one expected her appearance but she had an impact on SJW’s life and heart. Then during their conversation, IYH explains the meaning of the gentian, love in sadness. For her, if a person can embrace someone’s sorrow, then it is true love. Then she adds that her son is looking for a love like that. With her words, IYH is trying to covey to YMR that her son truly loves her. In this scene, we can see how much IYH loves her son and she wants to make sure that YMR doesn’t misunderstand SJW because he gave her WHK’s face. The viewer already knows that YMR is well aware of SJW’s deep feelings for her. Due to the former episodes, we had the impression that the writer chose this title because of tragic loves (the story of Hyacinth and Adonis) and had more tragedy in his mind. However with this revelation, I came to realize that the writer had a different intention, as love in Sadness has a different meaning: true love. Notice that all this time, SJW, KIW, HSH and JHR have been struggling due to a loved one. But were they really in love? Was it love or obsession or illusion or self-deception?

SJW thought that he loved WHK because he accepted everything from her and never argued with her. He actually fell more in love with her face and lived in an illusion as he never wanted to see WHK for whom she really was. To me, SJW didn’t truly love WHK because he faked happiness. Like IYH said, true love is when a person can embrace his/her partner’s sorrow. Right now, we have the impression that WHK was a selfish and ruthless woman but I believe that WHK might have been hiding a huge secret from SJW and his friends. JHR thinks that WHK had an abortion but just before the accident happened, she had cold hands and she complained about her stomach. I have the feeling that WHK could have been dying. If my theory is correct, she didn’t want to burden her husband’s happiness. Maybe in her own way, she tried to make SJW, HSH and even JHR happy, unaware that SJW had already caught her. She thought that JHR would reveal the abortion to SJW so that it would create a riff between herself and SJW. Maybe she thought that at some point, SJW would turn to JHR and find solace in his friend’s arms. If WHK was really dying, then she feared that SJW wouldn’t be able to overcome her death. As conclusion, it is definitely possible that WHK ruined her reputation on purpose.

Right now, SJW is clearly in love with YMR because he is not afraid of confronting her or risking his own life for her. He knows her trauma and will do anything for her. But now, what about JHR? Does she really love SJW? In my opinion, she is not in love with him. Based on her conversations with KIW, it becomes clear that JHR is longing for love. She has the impression that she has never been loved.

episode 14

The words she is saying to KIW could be perceived as if she was talking to herself. She thinks that SJW never loved her which is wrong. SJW did love her but as a sister, as a part of his family but for her, it was not love. Furthermore, she blamed her parents because they died so early so that she could never experience love. However, a love coming from the parents is different from the love coming from a man. So SJW with his mother did try to let her experience love but she never saw it as such. She is definitely living in an illusion. She has reduced the meaning of love: love can only be between a man and woman therefore SJW became her obsession. She was loved by SJW but she never viewed it as such because she had a different definition of love. Now, she is trying to woo KIW believing that she is the only one who can fix KIW. She knows what kind of person he is. But does she love KIW? To me, she doesn’t love KIW too. She is just trying to make herself feel better and superior. With her words “YMR who abandoned you” or in an earlier conversation, JHR always implied that YMR had never loved KIW hence he became a monster. By receiving love from her, he will be able to change.

episode 11

In this scene, JHR implies that YMR never loved her husband sincerely. She thinks that since she knows his true nature (monster, snake-like eyes of yours), she can control and even manipulate him. She thought so because KIW confided a lot to her: he visited her after hurting his fist or when he was too drunk. All this time, JHR thought that she had the upper-hand. Since KIW is a man with strong emotions, she believed that the chaebol would fall for her as she was direct and frank. But her words unveiled her weaknesses: not only her arrogance but also her savior complex. Notice that she did it with SJW once. She also thought that once WHK was dead, she would be able to replace her and become SJW’s wife. Here, she is doing the same with KIW. She is not loving him, she is acting like a psychiatrist. All her attempts unveil that she doesn’t love herself at all in my opinion. She thinks that once a man loves her as a woman, she will feel loved. However, she is deceiving herself. JHR doesn’t know what love is therefore she doesn’t know what true love is. She is not honestly feeling sympathy for KIW’s pain because in reality, she is more talking to herself. She wished, someone would say these words to her. This explains why KIW deceives JHR in the end. He never bought her “sympathy” and her speech for love. Her arrogance made her forget the true personality of KIW: a royal cobra.

As for KIW, it is clear that he has never loved his wife. Like he confessed to JHR in the episode 13, when he saw YMR’s face for the first time, she looked so much like his mother that it took his breath away. KIW is not just suffering from abandonment issues, he doesn’t know what love is. For him, love is possession which he learnt from his father. He treats YMR like an object which he can mistreat, when he feels like it. KIW doesn’t know what true love is as he can not embrace his mother’s sorrow. He resents her for running away all this time and for choosing death over him. For him, love and betrayal are connected to each other that’s why he has always expected that YMR would leave his side. Yet, he has not realized that he was the reason for all this.

Finally, HSH claimed that he loved WHK, however he decided to leave her behind, when she was hurt because he would lose everything: his reputation, his friend aso. Just like IYH said, true love is when someone is loving another in pain and when the partner is having a hard time… HSH was just a selfish person in the end.

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Love in Sadness: an analysis of self-portraits

~ Bébébisous33 ~ Leave a comment

Striking is that in this drama, we can witness the birth of a painting. The beholder usually only gets to see the start or the end product but not a work in progress. Nevertheless, we saw here two paintings that were not finished and each time, the finished work revealed the real state of mind of our heroine YMR, as both creations were named as a self-portrait. The difference between the paintings underlined that something had happened to our painter. But now, let’s take a closer look to these paintings. The first “Self-Portrait” was used in the first episode.

This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is image-1.png
A cistus: episode 1 (the painting is unfinished, right after this taking, due to KIW’s remark, YMR gives the picture a name: ” A self-portrait”
The painting “A self-portrait” is now finished. We learn here the meaning of the cistus: I’ll die tomorrow.

Looking at the first picture, we can observe two things:

  • the darkness of the picture: we see a dead wood, she even used a lot of black and brown
  • First, we have two flowers. Furthermore their white color contrast so much to the surrounding. Since the flowers are blossomed, they indicate that their withering is about to happen, especially due to the environment.

So since it is a self-portrait, it actually symbolizes her actual situation: she is in a terrible situation. Her husband is embodied by the dead wood, he can not bring her happiness and life, actually he is the reason why she is perishing. Her world is cold and she feels lonely. There is no light, so there is no hope. The choice of a white flower and the number of cistus caught my attention because in the episode 12, she said that the flowers represent her heart and tears. It looks like back then YMR had lost all her energy hence there are only two flowers. Due to her desperate situation, she can not even cry. She is withering like a flower…
So the first version wasn’t just depressing because of the dark colors and the environment. Even the choice of the flower was pessimistic: I’ll die tomorrow. However, in the finale version, the beholder observes a huge difference: the flowers are burning. This indicates that not only her situation has even worsened but also her despair has increased. She is literally screaming for help and if no one can see this, then she will die. Moreover, the fire could be perceived as a final attempt from her part. She will leave her husband and if she doesn’t succeed, then she is even willing to die, to get burned. So she is well aware of her husband’s outburst, if she leaves him again.

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episode 10:
The painting is called “A Self-Portrait Part Two” the first and unfinished version

In the second self-portrait, we also saw a first version (third picture above). Striking is the presence of wood, just like in the first self-portrait. Nevertheless, the wood is different. Here YMR used a table, unlike in the first painting where it looks more like a dead wood. Moreover, there is a presence of a human being in this picture due to the cup of tea and the letter envelope indicating that there is life in this picture. Finally, our painter chose to draw anemones in her painting. She even drew more anemones than cistus. Since the flower is red and the color red is associated to blood and life, I come to the conclusion that YMR’s state of mind has already changed. She has been brought back to life, since the painting is already oozing more life. The first version is still dark, although the beholder can see a ray of sunshine on the table. Yet the light is barely visible. Furthermore the message behind the anemone is “May I confess my love for you?” which illustrates that her heart has started beating again. She is no longer lifeless and loveless. Like she said to SJW, the flowers symbolizes her tears and heart. She can cry now. She has started caring for SJW. Due to the presence of wood in this self-portrait, we can come to the conclusion that YMR hasn’t been able to cut ties entirely with KIW, he is still affecting her life. The wood reveals that she is still suffering from a trauma.

episode 11: “A Self-Portrait Part Two”, the final version

The final version mirrors the evolution of her mental health. It looks like the flowers are actually growing from the table. YMR is able to remove little by little her bad memories, recover these with new good memories. Notice that this time, the flowers are painted with green leaves indicating that the flowers are not cut or put on the table, they look as if they were really alive. Then the ray of sunshine is much more pronounced this time. The dark and gloomy atmosphere has entirely disappeared. There is now more hope. YMR is not back to her old self, yet she has changed a lot. She is alive, feeling many emotions. The presence of a living person is also more visible than in the first version. Now, we see a letter with a feather. It was as if YMR had just left the table. Since YMR is not able to paint herself, this shows how much YMR suffered under KIW. She had lost her identity and her own personality, yet this time, YMR has found the courage to show to the world that she exists with different items: the envelopes, the letter and the feather. Naturally, she has another reason now, not to draw her face, since she has received the face of WHK. This second self-portrait still outlines her identity loss but unlike in the first self-portrait, the beholder can realize that YMR is searching for her own identity. She is trying with all her might to find her own place that’s what the growing flowers are representing. The flowers are trying to find their place in that table, it looks like the flowers want to cover the table, a symbol for her attempt to forget her painful experience and memories. As conclusion, YMR is no longer pessimistic and desperate. She is alive, feeling many positive emotions and she is hoping that she can leave her past behind.

When YMR offered SJW her self-portrait, SJW could connect her painting to the famous painting of Frida Kahlo, a famous Mexican painter. Both characters were referring to that following picture, the wounded deer:

Image result for frida kahlo wounded deer
Frida Kahlo: wounded deer, 1946

Back then, Frida Kahlo had just been surged on her spine but her surgery had not been successful. Unlike in YMR’s self-portraits, Frida used an animal in order to represent herself. However, the deer has her face. Notice how the surroundings can give us a clue about Frida Kahlo’s state of mind. The forest looks lifeless, the trees are leafless, even one tree has lost a branch which lies on the ground. The dead nature embodies broken body of the painter. Furthermore, the colors (brown and beige) give a gloomy and pessimistic impression. The sun is not visible, just like there is no wave in the sea. All these elements put together make the beholder feel that there is no life and no energy. Frida Kahlo is heartbroken and broken physically. Moreover, the painter used an unreal perspective for the wounded deer. It doesn’t look like it is standing on its feet, but it doesn’t look like it is lying on the ground either. In my opinion, Frida wants to underline how terrible her physical situation is: she is not really paralyzed but she can not move freely either. She can not rest in the end. The arrows symbolize the surgery and the pain in her spine due to the surgery as the arrows are situated all around her spine. As you can see, the deer mirrors Frida Kahlo’s situation and feelings as the deer has Frida’s face. The Mexican painter is feeling powerless and she is showing her pain and despair to the world through her painting. YMR is in a different situation as she has lost her identity, unlike Frida Kahlo, that’s why the flowers have no face at all or there is no human being represented among her flowers. However, I am expecting YMR to be capable to drew a third self-portrait later which will be similar to her first painting that KIW saw in the beginning.

A woman holding a sword lily

We know that this week, YMR will leave SJW’s side as she will use WHK’s death to her advantage. By forcing SJW to declare WHK dead, KIW will be cornered. WHK was the only link to his wife’s whereabouts. For her, this departure will have a huge impact as she will be able to free herself completely from KIW.