Jinx: Daily Jinx Advent Insight 18 📆😘💋

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In this essay, I would like to focus on the doctor’s kiss in chapter 44. (chapter 44)

What does this gesture mean exactly?

One might reply that the physical therapist is kissing his cauliflower ear as a sign of acceptance. He likes everything about the champion, not only his handsome face (chapter 44), but also his wounded ears, his „imperfections“. One might add that by kissing the ear, Kim Dan is indirectly recognizing the champion‘s past and as such his previous fights. Therefore we should see this kiss on the ear as a gesture of admiration as well. However, I think, there is more to it.

First, it is important to question ourselves what incited Kim Dan to give the celebrity a peck kiss. Why did he caress and kiss his lover’s face so carefully? I believe that the young man’s action had been triggered by coach Jeong Yosep. (chapter 43) Note that he put some cream on his face in order to obtain his consent. He showed him that the athlete had nothing to fear from this surprise party and the cake. (chapter 43) That’s how the 29 years old man learned that the face symbolizes vulnerability, care and respect. Another explanation is that the protagonist was following his own heart, because he had given his consent to his partner. (chapter 44) In other words, this quick but tender kiss was the expression from the “hamster’s heart”. One might see this interpretation as a validation, when the young doctor came to this realization: (chapter 44) On the other hand, his words expose his previous dishonesty towards himself concerning sex. He knew deep down that sex could be the expression of love and not immorality and corruption. Sex is dirty. (chapter 20) His thoughts were definitely influenced by his grandmother. Secondly, observe that he is implying that this intercourse just looks like making love. On the one hand, this observation indicates the doctor’s low self-esteem. He can not imagine that the champion would make love to him. On the other hand, his words imply that Kim Dan was aware of the athlete’s drunkenness. Deep down, he knew that his soulmate was not true to himself. He was acting under the influence of the alcohol, though the readers should keep in their mind that in wine, there‘s truth. Nevertheless, the divulging of his vulnerability was not the star‘s choice.

The “strange love” between Doc Dan and Jaekyung

That’s how it dawned on me that the young man was acting for the first time as a selfish person. He was following his true desires. Therefore we should see this intercourse as the positive version of their “first Wedding night” together. (chapter 3) (chapter 3) And how did the celebrity appear during that night? Selfish, rough, brutal like a beast… or better said, like a leopard!! The gaze from the dangerous feline changed during that magical night: he appeared as a sulky cat. (chapter 44) Interesting is that the athlete reciprocated to his partner’s animalistic gestures: (chapter 44) Nuzzling often evokes imagery of animals displaying affection or seeking comfort, particularly creatures like leopards, or even wolves, which use gentle contact to bond with their pack or mate. So nuzzling like a leopard suggests graceful affection, a combination of power and tenderness. It reflects a careful approach, as though the young man is testing his lover’s response while still exuding vulnerability. But if you consider the star as a wolf, then the latter do it as a sign of trust and reassurance. Wolves are seeking comfort and offering unconditional love. This comparison highlights loyalty and the young man’s desire to feel close to his partner emotionally and physically.

To conclude, the peck on the cheek (chapter 44) and the ear (chapter 44) were mirroring the behavior of a “hamster” trying to get to know his soulmate, the leopard. 😉

He was testing his boundaries, as Kim Dan was carefully exploring his lover’s reactions. The shift from a cheek kiss to this more intimate gesture could indicate a desire to gauge comfort levels or test mutual affection. He was expressing his subtle vulnerability. A peck can signify a tentative step toward deeper intimacy, reflecting the young man’s own hesitations or the novelty of this dynamic in their relationship. Unlike passionate or dominating kisses, a peck is often gentle and exploratory. It suggests an effort to connect emotionally rather than to assert control or satisfy desire. Moreover, observe that he was taking his time, giving space for the other person to respond or reciprocate. And now, you comprehend why he let the champion make such an expression: (chapter 44) These kisses symbolized respect and care. However, since the other partner was drunk, Kim Dan was actually violating social norms. Above, I mentioned that he was just following his own heart, and the latter is a synonym for instincts. Yes, this sex session stood under the sign of animalistic love and not love between two humans who are equals.

But there exists another evidence that this beautiful night was a reflection from their first night. Both protagonists had the same desire and feeling. Both of them didn’t want the night to end: (chapter 44) versus (chapter 4)

It is important to realize this connection between animalistic behavior in their relationship and their separation. It explains why their relationship was doomed to fail first. The reason is simple. They were not treating each other like humans. Kim Dan’s low self-esteem was restraining the doctor from voicing his true desires, from becoming mature and as such responsible for himself. He never saw himself as a worthy person. As for the other, he just viewed the physical therapist as a tool and pawn. First, he was just a prostitute, later a PT, yet he still doubted his loyalty. The problem is that they were both following conformity which symbolizes lack of critical thinking and control. In other words, in order to reconnect with each other, the two protagonists must find the right balance between nature and civilization. Money shouldn’t replace integrity or happiness. IF homosexuality is a huge taboo in the MMA fighting world, it just exposes the society’s hypocrisy and intolerance. Homosexuality has nothing to do with lack of strength or masculinity.

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